WikiLeaks is Run by an Insecure Eighth Grade Girl

WikiLeaks founder Julian Assange bravely said his mission is to expose and skewer “lying, corrupt and murderous leadership from Bahrain to Brazil,” in an email sent from his hideout. That more people will likely be killed was apparently lost on the brave fighter for Truth.

Assange seems more and more like the 8th grade girl who has a hard time talking to boys and thinks that hurting other girls will make her more popular. He’s an attention whore who doesn’t care who gets hurt as long as people look at him.

For his part, President Obama, who is apparently Very Disappointed, had the Legal Advisor to the Department of State, Harold Koh, send a Strongly Worded Letter to Assange, threatening all sorts of Dire Consequences if he continues to release similar documents. Unfortunately, the letter neglects to get into any discussion of dire consequences for Assange. As William Jacobson, proprietor of the blog Legal Insurrection points out, the letter that should have been sent six months ago should have read:

Dear Wikileaks,

If you publish any more material we will hunt you down no matter the cost, and you either will be killed while resisting arrest or you will spend the rest of your lives in solitary confinement in a Supermax prison, where the highlight of your day will be 1 hour spent in a cage instead of your cell. Don’t look up, that sound of propellers in the air is not a Predator drone.

Sincerely,

Harold Koh

One of the comments to that entry is even more pithy:

Final thought of Julian Assange:

“What is that fine. pink mist I see? Wow, all of a sudden I have a tremendous headache.”

But fear not, gentle reader; Eric Holder is on top of things.

As the documents are reviewed, their contents were found to range between things we did not know, but suspected to things we were certain of to things we were amazed that not everyone knew.

Still, we shouldn’t fret or worry about dear Julian. Oogo Chavez’ buddy Ecuadorean Deputy Foreign Minister Kintto Lucas has offered him sanctuary.

That the documents were stolen and handed over to the smarmy Assange is not the fault of President Obama. His complicity lies much deeper. By his inaction and failure to firmly deal with the likes of Assange, he is showing that the actions of Assange and others of his stripe have no negative consequences as far as we’re concerned, so they should essentially feel free to continue without worry of being captured, shot, or disappeared.


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Texpat
Texpat
November 30, 2010 6:56 pm

WB

I saw Jacobson’s post right after he put it up. The “pink mist” commenter had me laughing out loud.

SC
SC
November 30, 2010 10:45 am

I have a feeling this guy will just suddenly disappear

Tedtam
Admin
November 30, 2010 9:53 am

Assange does kinda look like an eighth grade girl.

texanadian
texanadian
November 30, 2010 9:13 am
El Gordo
November 30, 2010 9:01 am

Here’s a little more documentation supporting my thesis of the Wikileaker.
http://www.tabletmag.com/news-and-politics/51628/deadly-fictions/

Here’s a take from Slate, not exactly a far right wing publication:
http://www.slate.com/id/2276190/?from=rss

bob42
November 30, 2010 8:57 am

If I was a republican, I’d find this embarrassing. “This bill is necessary because we have a president whom the American people don’t know whether he was born in Kenya or some other place,” Rep. Leo Berman, R-Tyler, said in reference to President Barack Obama and of House Bill 295. “If you are running for president or vice president, you’ve… Read more »

El Gordo
November 30, 2010 8:49 am

If Wikileaks is being run by an 8th grade girl, who is running our country? That the documents were stolen and handed over to the smarmy Assange is not the fault of President Obama. I wouldn’t be so sure of that statement. Our beloved politicians fear the open and free communication channel that the internet provides, and after this election… Read more »

texanadian
texanadian
November 30, 2010 8:35 am

Thanks mom “He said something that scared her, things that a guy will only say to his mom, like . . . ‘Life’s not worth living anymore,’ ” said Larry Aitken, Brian’s father. Sue Aitken, a trained social worker, decided to play it safe and called police, but she hung up before the 9-1-1 dispatcher could answer. Police traced the… Read more »

mharper42
mharper42
November 30, 2010 8:33 am

Obama could issue a stern sound-bite: “Assange acted stupidly.”

That’ll fix it.

texanadian
texanadian
November 30, 2010 8:31 am

0830 and no ones up yet? Tsk, tsk.

Katfish
November 30, 2010 8:01 pm

While Obama may not want to do anything decisive with Assange, the Russians may not be so reticent.

In Russia, power speak truth to you.

Dooood
November 30, 2010 6:56 pm

WB

I saw Jacobson’s post right after he put it up. The “pink mist” commenter had me laughing out loud.

SC
SC
November 30, 2010 10:45 am

I have a feeling this guy will just suddenly disappear

Tedtam
Admin
November 30, 2010 9:53 am

Assange does kinda look like an eighth grade girl.

Katfish
November 30, 2010 9:28 am

I posted an O/C thread just now. The Boss must be hungover.

texanadian
texanadian
November 30, 2010 9:13 am
Super Dave
November 30, 2010 9:01 am

Here’s a little more documentation supporting my thesis of the Wikileaker.
http://www.tabletmag.com/news-and-politics/51628/deadly-fictions/

Here’s a take from Slate, not exactly a far right wing publication:
http://www.slate.com/id/2276190/?from=rss

OletimerLin
OletimerLin
November 30, 2010 8:57 am

If I was a republican, I’d find this embarrassing. “This bill is necessary because we have a president whom the American people don’t know whether he was born in Kenya or some other place,” Rep. Leo Berman, R-Tyler, said in reference to President Barack Obama and of House Bill 295. “If you are running for president or vice president, you’ve… Read more »

Super Dave
November 30, 2010 8:49 am

If Wikileaks is being run by an 8th grade girl, who is running our country? That the documents were stolen and handed over to the smarmy Assange is not the fault of President Obama. I wouldn’t be so sure of that statement. Our beloved politicians fear the open and free communication channel that the internet provides, and after this election… Read more »

mharper42
mharper42
November 30, 2010 8:33 am

Obama could issue a stern sound-bite: “Assange acted stupidly.”

That’ll fix it.

texanadian
texanadian
November 30, 2010 8:31 am

0830 and no ones up yet? Tsk, tsk.