Pentagon renames F-35s ‘Lauren Boeberts’ ensuring 24/7 night vision footage of them
PENTAGON—In a surprising move that’s set to revolutionize both the military and reality TV, the Pentagon has announced plans to rename all of its F-35 fighter jets ‘Lauren Boeberts.’ This decision, officials say, is aimed at ensuring live 24/7 night vision footage of these aircraft from five different angles, providing a unique and riveting viewing experience and making sure none go missing from now on.
Plus this,
Lauren Boebert, the fiery and frequently controversial congresswoman from Colorado, was reportedly chosen for this honor due to her penchant for making headlines and her enthusiastic advocacy for the Second Amendment. “It’s a win-win situation,” General Maverick explained. “We get to show off our sleek fighter jets, and Congresswoman Boebert gets a front-row seat to her namesake in action.”
Under the new naming scheme, each F-35 will be equipped with state-of-the-art night vision cameras that will live-stream their missions around the clock. This move is expected to provide viewers with unprecedented access to aerial combat, refueling, and occasional flybys of national landmarks.
In case you are worried our military is preoccupied with leftist absurdities, rest assured these generals and admirals are right on top of every possible action to protect the American people.
The Senate, on Wednesday, confirmed General Charles Q. Brown, Jr., as Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, with an overwhelming majority.
The vote for Brown’s appointment was finalized, with 83-11.
Currently, Brown is the Chief of Staff for the U.S. Air Force.
Welcome to the the four branches of DEI.
Not Satire:
Pray we elect a proper President and fire all these disreputable creeps.
President Biden’s nominee for chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff has a history of prioritizing controversial diversity, equity, and inclusion (DEI) initiatives as the top commander of the U.S. Air Force.
On multiple occasions, Gen. Charles Q. Brown, Jr., who has served as Air Force Chief of Staff since 2020, stressed his desire to push such objectives and include them in multiple facets of the Air Force’s operations. Biden nominated Brown in May to succeed Army Gen. Mark A. Milley upon his planned retirement in October.
According to a 2020 report by Air and Space Forces Magazine, diversity “moved to the forefront of personnel decisions such as promotions and hiring” under Brown’s supervision, something he celebrated during a speaking engagement held that same year.
“I hire for diversity, because they all bring a different perspective, which makes my decisions that much better, because I hear different sides of the argument,” Brown told attendees at the virtual event hosted by the Chicago Council on Global Affairs.
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