In honor of our host, we have a roundup of weird news items from everyone’s favorite loony-bin:
Florida lived up to its reputation for being an odd state in 2010, with residents committing stupid crimes, making poor decisions and exhibiting general weirdness.
.
There was the man pulled over in Manatee County who claimed the crack in his crack wasn’t his. Officers found bags of marijuana and crack cocaine stuffed between the man’s butt cheeks. He said the pot was his but “the white stuff is not mine.”
How big was his posterior buttockal area that he could fit “bags” of weed & booger sugar in is posterior vertical smile?
They also managed to keep various bomb squads busy:
Threatening items that bomb squads had to handle this year included a box with two kittens in Cocoa and a stuffed pony in Orange County. Authorities blew up the stuffed pony, but spared the kittens. A Melbourne street was shut down for three hours, the time it took the bomb squad to figure out the flashing object in the middle of the street was a restaurant pager.
Get back, or I swear I’ll page you!
Nor was odd news limited to the living. A family honoring a relative’s dying wish gave him a burial at sea, only to have the body resurface off a Fort Lauderdale beach.
Must have been a drifter.
Leave a Reply
You must be logged in to post a comment.